Mess of Greens

full bellies | warm welcomes

Southern Hospitality

Sister’s Banana Bread

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Everybody down south knows about Sister Shubert… her orange rolls, cinnamon rolls, and yeast rolls are in EVERY grocery freezer in EVERY town and have been served by just about everybody at some point or another. My college roommate spoke about her in VERY reverent and hushed tones. 😉 I knew she was a big deal down here, but what I didn’t know is that Sister is an honest-to-goodness actual lady and that she is generous, and thoughtful, and all around lovely.

I came to know this because my Aunt, Uncle, and Grandmother lived in her hometown of Andalusia, Alabama for many years. My aunt couldn’t say enough wonderful things about Sister (actually, truly what she’s called), and when my grandmother died, rather than just bringing a regular casserole or fruit salad, she shipped us The. Biggest. Box. of frozen baked goods you’ve ever seen. I’m pretty sure that box alone fed my family for a month.

Anyway, she’s so generous that she also shares her recipes for yeast rolls, cinnamon rolls, and other breads in two (1) (2) pretty wonderful cookbooks. (The REAL recipes y’all. They WORK!)

Finally, after living in our new house for two months, my cookbooks got unpacked the other day. This meant I could FINALLY get my hands on them. I could hardly stand it I wanted to cook something so bad. Thankfully, we had a big bunch of frozen bananas that were WAY past their prime, so I pulled out Sister’s cookbook and tried her version of banana bread. It was a hit with my little person (and everyone else for that matter) AND it gave him a chance to stir, stir, stir. I modified the recipe a TEENY bit,  (no nuts, butter rather than shortening) but you could do it her way and it would still be divine! Let me know if you make it!

Sister's Banana Bread
 
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Author:
Serves: 2 loaves
What You Need
  • 2 cups all-purpose flour
  • 1 teaspoon baking soda
  • ½ teaspoon salt
  • ½ cup butter
  • 1 cup sugar
  • 2 large eggs
  • 1½ cups mashed overripe bananas
  • ½ teaspoon vanilla
What to Do
  1. Preheat your oven to 325ºF.
  2. Butter ad flour two 8x4 inch loaf pans so you're ready when the batter is ready.
  3. Combine flour, baking soda and salt; set aside.
  4. Beat the butter using an electric mixer until its creamy; gradually add sugar until totally incorporated and fluffy.
  5. Add the eggs, one at a time, beating them in just until yellow disappears after each addition.
  6. Add the banana puree' and vanilla; beat until blended.
  7. Gradually add the dry flour mixture, (1/2 cup by ½ cup works well) beating just until blended
  8. Pour batter into the pans.
  9. Bake for 1 hour or until you can put a toothpick in the middle and it comes out clean.
  10. Cool in pans on wire racks 10 minutes

 

To Mr. & Mrs. Smith!

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Oh y’all,

We had the most wonderful weekend and I can FINALLY tell y’all about it since it’s no longer a secret! Our friends Ruffin and Jill decided last week to elope and asked us to come up to the Delta officiate and witness the ceremony. IMG_3645

We drove up Saturday afternoon, Brett did a sweet short ceremony in their sunny, breezy Mississippi Delta garden. Afterward, we  toasted their love and ate cake at their house, and then went to have a celebratory supper at Doe’s Eat Place. (Which, by the way, was the most delicious wedding reception food I’ve ever eaten. Hands down.)

Ruffin and Jill met several years ago at the Alluvian Hotel bar in Greenwood. Though Jill lived in Monroe, Louisiana, and Ruffin was a farmer and mayor of Louise, Mississippi, they immediately began a long-distance relationship….

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Radical Hospitality

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I went to divinity school. Have I told you that?

It’s where I first learned the phrase “Radical Hospitality” and I’m pretty sure it references the Christian church’s mission to welcome and affirm all people where they are and exactly as they are. It’s also probably connected to some theologian’s views about communion… that since the early church didn’t just give people tiny Styrofoam wafers or small hunks of bread and thimbles of wine, but rather, the wealthier members of the church provided a real, full meal for the entire church community. Everyone was welcome, whether or not they had anything to contribute, whether or not they were “model” members.

When I mentioned that I was going to try to live even more into my belief and value of radical hospitality this year, my dad had some questions…

“What does it mean to be radical?”

“Isn’t radical kind of a negative word?”

“What about people who you have fundamental or deep-seeded disagreements?”

“What will this actually look like?”

And I was super glad he asked me all of that, because, to be honest, I wasn’t totally clear about it when I made the declaration that this was a commitment I was making.

First of all, here’s the actual definition of Radical:

  • very new and different from what is traditional or ordinary

  • very basic and important; the root

  • having extreme political or social views that are not shared by most people

Now, on the day we remember Jesus’s crucifixion because he was radical and the weekend we celebrate His resurrection, here’s what I think: Radical maybe is a negative word to some, but to me, it’s the word that describes Jesus. He constantly pushed against teachings, actions, and practices of people of faith…disturbing their comfortable positions and challenging what they held to be true. He was radical in ALL three of the above senses.

On this day we remember a man who was radical. He was full of love. He empowered the oppressed, challenged the status quo, made his faith political, and reminded Christians that love should be at the root things earned a death he didn’t deserve.

When I say I want to practice radical hospitality, I am speaking about hospitality that is extreme and fundamental. I want everyone, everyone, truly everyone to have an invitation to my table and for the words ‘welcome’ and ‘share’ to be natural extensions of my character at all times.

This will mean that I seek out new voices, and people with different experiences, and it will mean that I try to offer hospitality in the ways that others prefer to receive it rather than the way I THINK it SHOULD be offered.

It will mean that I welcome people with whom I disagree, and that I try to bring people who disagree with one another together to share. I’m guessing that it will be hard, and uncomfortable at times, and I think I’m ready for that… but it also means that it will be full of joy, and adventure, and new experiences and stories. It will give me proximity to people who are marginalized or who I might not otherwise know. It will teach me empathy, and humility.

Anyway, I needed to saw that out loud, and here on MoG so that you can help me be accountable. I mean it. Today I’ll be remembering Jesus’ death and also praying for and looking toward the hope, joy, and beauty of His resurrection on Sunday.

Honk Honk! Beep Beep! Choo Choo! Wagner is 2!

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Y’all, my little boy turned 2. TWO. I honestly don’t know how it happened so quickly, but it seems like overnight he went from a little lump of smushy skin and teeny hands to a big, active boy who loves trains and trucks and playing in mud puddles.

I REALLY like birthdays, LOVE birthdays. Have always made a HUGE deal about other people’s. After my little was born I realized that birthdays are even MORE special. I mean, giving birth to the person being celebrated maybe changed my perspective a little bit. I mean, I’d kind of been thinking for several years that for bringing me into the world my mama ought to be the one to get the cake and presents on my birthday, but now I just feel like Wagner’s birthday is also special because it’s the day I went from being plain old Biz into being Biz, an honest to goodness MOTHER. Anyway, for all those reasons it seems to me like February 25th deserves to be celebrated a whole week.

We had a party the Saturday after Wagner’s birthday with a transportation theme and 7 little friends from his Kindermusik class. Since we’re pretty new in town still, it was fun for me to see the mamas that I only sort-of know outside of a crazy hour-long sing along, and it was REALLY fun for Wagner to play with his buddies and eat all of his favorite foods.

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Elizabeth Heiskell on Hospitality, Hats and Baseboards

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We’ve had a season of hosting little things and bigger things and having our favorite house guests, which has been so wonderful and fun. But, #RealTalk, if you’re a half-way introvert like me (I’m totally borderline INFJ/ENFJ if you’re a Meyers-Briggs person) living in a house with lots of people and having guests over means you have to find time for self care.

How do people who entertain for a living do it?

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Photo property of Elizabeth Heiskell Catering and Woodson Ridge Farms

Elizabeth Heiskell, my cousin up in North Mississippi is basically THE most amazing hostess, caterer, storyteller, and chef that I know personally. Her farm-to-table events are known all over Delta, her farm’s vegetables are used in kitchens from Nashville to Oxford, her food is coveted at tailgates across the state, and now, her recipes and bubbly personality are being beamed into living rooms around the country because she’s been cooking on the Today Show about once a month.

I gave her a ring recently to pick her brain about hospitality, entertaining, and family… and what I got was actual delta-deep-south-debutante-wisdom for the ages. 😉 …

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A Casual Red Beans & Rice Valentine’s Day Soiree!

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IMG_1292Every week, I’m going to try to share a story of hospitality, a fun party that I’ve hosted or attended, or just wisdom from other folks about what it means to provide a warm welcome.

This year we’d tried to have a fun winter bonfire out on our farm back in late December, (I was hoping for an Appalachian “Breakin’ up of Christmas” theme, but the weather DID. NOT. COOPERATE.

I mean, who wants to have a bonfire, eat red beans and rice, and make s’mores in rainy 80 degree weather? Not me or anyone I know. But we’d already made all the red beans and rice, and they freeze pretty well, so we just rescheduled for a later date. We chose Valentine’s day since Sundays are GREAT farm party days, and since our place is named Redstone Farm after the Choctaw word for the creek that runs down the middle, we went with a RED theme on Valentine’s Day.

I know… everyone has mixed feelings (or super negative or CRAZY positive feelings) about this greeting card holiday, but who has mixed feelings about hot cocoa, friendship, and the great outdoors? Better not say that you’re that person… fun sponge. 😉

I know it’s a little out of season, BUT I wanted to share these photos that my wonderful and super talented friends from Studio 5Fifty and Scruggs Photography in Laurel took for me and tell you a little bit about the party. Read on for a menu, some decorating ideas, and a list of things to do, so next winter or valentine’s day, you can be ready for your own easy, fun, bonfire party! Also,I guess if it’s still chilly where you are this would totally work as an early spring-time fete, too. …

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Uber Hospitality

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“No way!” my friend Emmy exclaimed. “I guess that means I’ve seen you play.”

We had just learned that our DC Uber driver was not only the owner of a local fitness company but also a former Arena Football League player in Lubbock, TX. Emmy was a Lubbock native and had seen several Arena League games during the time he had been playing.

The next day, my driver was a Justice Department employee who was finishing his Ph.D. about the connection between emotional intelligence and ethical behavior in American police forces. A different driver worked for an alternative-energy company that gave away free solar panels, and still a third was an immigrant who’d moved to the US speaking no English at all, and who had recently graduated from college and was trying to get a job in social media marketing.

It’s no secret that I’m one of those people who talks to everyone. Hearing people’s stories, learning about their lives, their families, their interests are some of my favorite things in the whole world. I learned it from my dad, who goes out of his way to make friends from the grocery store check out line to the airport terminal. We just can’t help it… we love people.

Maybe that’s why I think Uber and Lyft are just so darn fantastic. It’s an awesome chance to make new pals and learn new things.

If you’re wondering how this plays out… well, I ALWAYS sit in the front seat. It gives me a better chance to connect in real ways with Toni, or Ron, or Damien. And I also ALWAYS ask them if driving is a hobby or their day job. If it’s a hobby, then I dig into what they do 9-5 and why they do it. In my experience, after talking to these people for about ten minutes, most of the drivers are the coolest, most interesting people who use driving as a way to earn a little extra cash.

For example, this weekend in Birmingham I had three different lovely souls as my drivers. Sure, one guy ended up telling me a little too much about he and his wife’s sex life, but he was playing Bob Marley the whole time and opened our ride with “Good Morning! I am SO full of JOY!” which is really a fantastic way to start a Saturday morning. Another driver who was a retired factory worker shared his memories of living in Birmingham throughout the Civil Rights Movement, and gave me his sister’s account of the Children’s March, since she participated in it and was jailed with hundreds if not thousands of other Black children who stood up for justice and equality.

I am obviously disturbed by the story in the news of violence and murder in Kalamazoo.  Nothing justifies that driver’s actions, and my heart goes out to the victims. I’ve had great experiences with Uber and Lyft drivers, though. They are just folks riding around a city, picking up people and making a little cash so they can continue to follow their dreams and keep up a decent quality of life in a place where the costs of living just keep rising.

For me, Uber has been a way to meet truly interesting people and try to see the city I’m visiting through their eyes. By driving around and telling me about their own passions, ideas, and experiences they are showing me real hospitality and giving me a peek into their lives even though we’ve just met. It’s more than a financial transaction…it’s a real, meaningful interaction between two souls.

Because I personally find so much energy and joy through these moments, I’m not going to let the news media scare me from using these services, and I hope you won’t either. In fact, I’d love it if you’d leave a comment telling me about your most memorable Uber Driver Conversation. And if you don’t usually chat with your drivers, I encourage you, start today!

Dolly Parton, Chicken & Dumplings, and Food that Comforts

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When we had our son, Wagner, my entire church and most of our coworkers kept our bellies full and our freezer stocked for nearly three months. We had cassaroles, salads, fruit, cold-cuts, rolls, cakes, venison burgers… oh, and PIES. So good pies. This was the most wonderful gift we could have been given, especially since we were sleep deprived, cranky, and barely functional. It’s a tradition that’s not unique to Mississippi for people to “fix you something.” All over the south, when someone has a baby, or someone gets sick, or someone’s family member dies, food appears on the doorstep with prayers and love. It’s the most amazing thing. I’ve had people send love (also known as food) when my own grandmothers and grandfather died, and as my mother was battling (and winning) lung cancer.
Food comforts in ways that words can’t in certain situations. My favorite thing to take in situations where comfort food is called for is chicken and dumplins (it also happens to be one of my favorite things to eat in the world, so I figure it’s probably everyone else’s, too, right?) They are warm, and fill your belly, and just right. Honestly, “fixing you something” is this incredible act of love and hospitality that is one of my most favorite things about our south.

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Hot Fruit, OR Why Brunch Food Should Be Made a Week in Advance.

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My friend Matty & his wife Suzette live in a precious Mississippi Delta town called Cleveland, home to Delta State University and probably fifteen-thousand people. They’re entrepreneurs, and advocates for education and the community, and generally all-around fun people. They LOVE Cleveland, but Matty’s one complaint (until a year or so ago) was that if you wanted brunch on a weekend, you had to drive 2 hours to Memphis or Jackson. Let’s be honest here.. no matter how awesome a rural community’s food culture is, brunch is the ONE meal that small town versions of dives, restaurants, and clubs just CAN’T often compete with their big-city counterparts…even in the south. Which means that if you live in a smaller town, and like to entertain, hosting a brunch for your friends rather than a dinner party is always a super great idea. Still not sure? Let me sell you…

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Hosting Our First Christmas Eve Dinner (for 14!)

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We had an amazing Christmas this year… Boone’s family came to the Delta and we had a big Christmas Eve dinner party for our friends whose families were in town. It was a fun crowd of about fourteen people who had mostly just met. We had Christmas crackers with silly paper hats, lots of spaghetti and homemade meatballs, homemade french bread and (maybe a little too much) red wine. I’m prety sure the paper hats and wine went a long way to making everyone feel at home. 😉

My favorite part was after dinner when we pulled out these silly homemade songbooks and sang Christmas carols with Boone’s dad on the guitar. To make singing a little easier for everybody, I made coffee syllabubs (a super easy and amazing after dinner drink that southerners adopted from the British and adapted with brandy and bourbon.)

I didn’t come up with the singing idea on my own… For almost every Christmas Night from birth until age 24, my grandparent’s best friends the Gilchrists would throw a HUGE back tie soiree’ with a cocktail hour, a lovely meal, toasts, and then after dinner drinks and singing around a piano. I feel like those parties were some of my most formative experiences about what it meant to be a southern lady and a welcoming host….

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